This is horrible. I've never felt worse in my life. My dinner consisted of 1/2 cup brown rice, a bag of steamed broccoli, and some sauteed mushrooms with lemon juice and a little balsamic vinegar. My body is definitely letting me know how loaded down with toxins it is. I had to leave work about 15 minutes early.
Physically I am drained. I have nausea about every 2 hours, a non-stop headache, and I cringe at the thought of having to take those stupid cleanse pills. YUCK!! I've had to talk myself into not quitting about every 10 minutes today. Honestly if I hadn't have spent so much money I probably would give up.
It's not so much the sweets and sodas and caffeine I miss as much as my daily yogurt and whole grain toast. If 2/3 of your body is made of yogurt then 1/3 of mine is made of yogurt...I eat that stuff like the world is coming to an end. I'll see how things go tonight but more than likely I'll feel worse in the morning...and I'll probably call in sick.
This has really opened my eyes to how much bad stuff I was actually putting in my body. My Dad once said that "if food is fuel then be only put the best in your tank." A friend of mine at work (the one whole told me about this) said that it has to break you down before it can build you back up. Immediately I thought about how the same is true in your walk with the Lord. Sometimes we fill ourselves with pride and things of the world and we're so full of ourselves that the only way God can do anything with us is to break us.
There is beauty in brokenness. When we're broken and vulnerable that's when we really and truly give all of ourselves to God and totally put everything in His hands. It's when were in that state that our "blinders" are taken off and we can see things more clearly. Most importantly God can mold us back into the men and women He's called us to be.
When I was sitting in church last night, listening to the pastor and fighting the side effects of this purification I thought about sacrifice. I know how much of a struggle it is for me to remain faithful to this process and it's only certain foods I have to abstain from. It puts a new meaning to "denying the flesh." My thoughts then moved to Jesus. If I'm struggling this much with this one little thing and it's only been 2 days...how much more did my Savior struggle. It puts some things into perspective...yet I still can't even begin to imagine all the things He went through and how perfect He was.
God, You are awesome. My prayer is that we all will receive the strength to fight and the patience to endure.
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